


In Another Life

by GeneralDisarray



Series: Fics written during class [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Blowjobs, Dead Castiel, Dead Dean Winchester, Dead Sam Winchester, Dean has a Panty Kink, Fluff, Heaven, Hurt/Comfort, It gets better I swear, M/M, Misunderstandings, Smut, Suicidal Castiel, Suicide, The Empty, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean, non-canon compliant deaths
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:28:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22456486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeneralDisarray/pseuds/GeneralDisarray
Summary: Castiel thought he’d be there when the stars died. Now he couldn’t be.But it wasn’t over. Not yet.ORThe Winchesters are dead. Cas gets to see them again. (It’s a lot fluffier than it seems)
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Fics written during class [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1606447
Comments: 10
Kudos: 74





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title from The One Who Got Away by Katy Perry.
> 
> This fic has suicide in it and makes it seem okay. IT IS NOT!
> 
> Please, if you feel like ending it talk to your friends and family or a hotline:
> 
> National Suicide Prevention Lifeline  
> 1-800-273-8255

Castiel sat on the hood of the Impala and stared up at the stars. He was there when they were created, and he thought he’d be there when they died. But now, he knew he wouldn’t be.

He couldn’t be. He couldn’t live, not-not now.

*

_ Castiel rushed into the abandoned home. He counted six dead vamps as he ran through the rooms. _

_ He found them in the living room. _

_ He knelt by them and could tell right away that Sam was already gone. _

_ Sam Winchester, the man who was good despite his very blood telling him not too, who hit a dog and stopped, was lying, dead, on the floor of some crappy house. _

_ “Sammy?” Dean croaked out, as if he could tell his brother was gone. _

_ “Cas.” He breathed out when he saw him. _

_ “Dean, it’s going to be fine.” Castiel pulled up Dean’s shirt and caught sight of the three  _ **_deep_ ** _ gashes in his stomach. He pulled in a sharp breath, “I-it’s going to be fi-fine.” _

_ “Sammy? Where’s Sammy? Wher-Cas?” _

_ Dean saw Castiel’s face. “Nononono. Take care of Sammy, look after your brother.” Dean babbled on. _

_ “Dean, I’m going to heal you, you’ll be fine.” Castiel lowered his hand but Dean weakly pushed him away. “Please Dean.” He let a tear slip. _

_ “Can’t be without Sammy.” _

_ Castiel could’ve overpowered him, but from Dean’s continuing pushes, Dean clearly didn’t want that. Castiel knew if he healed Dean that he would go to any means to get Sam back, most likely losing his life in the process. And then it would be a vicious cycle of sacrifices. And when Dean let out a whimper of please… _

_ Didn’t the Winchesters deserve to lay their weary heads to rest. _

_ So Castiel watched as Dean’s words became slurred, as he coughed up blood. Castiel watched Dean die. _

_ With one final breath, Dean closed his eyes and followed his brother. _

_ * _

He tried, he really did, to live without the Winchesters. But Heaven didn’t want him and Earth didn’t either.

He drove their car, he worked their cases, but he wasn’t the heroes they were. On his last case, a woman died that he could’ve saved, that the Winchesters would’ve saved. It was then that he stopped trying.

Castiel lasted for a year without the hunters. But now he couldn’t go on.

Humans called it an eternal sleep, and that’s what it was, at least for angels. He would go to the Empty. And rest.

Castiel gave one last pat to the Impala. She was a good car, maybe someone would find her. He took the blade lying on her hood.

He shed a single tear for the Boy with the Demon Blood and the Righteous Man. And plunged the blade into his chest.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel is dead. At least, he thinks so.

Castiel woke up in the bunker.

He was in Dean’s room. He’d been sleeping there ever since the hunter died. But this wasn’t the same dark room, untouched except for the bed. This room was bright and had clothes on the dresser and a glass of half drunk water on the nightstand. This wasn’t right.

Castiel exited Dean’s room. The whole bunker was wrong. It felt- homey, it hadn’t felt like that since...was it-no. But Castiel heard voices from the kitchen, he hadn’t heard that in a long time.

Castiel walked into the kitchen and- _ ohmygod. _

“ _ Dean. _ ” He breathed. The man turned just in time to catch and armful of angel. Castiel pulled back a little. “But you were dead?”

“We are dead.” Said a voice beside him. Castiel turned to find 200 lbs. of flannel moose. “Hey Cas.”

“Hello Sam.” Sam pulled him into a “bro hug” as Dean called it. 

“Cas, what are you doing here? How did you get in? I thought Heaven is blocked off.”

“It is. I-I’m not supposed to be here.”

“This has to be a dream. I’m dreaming. I’m in the Empty.” Cas panicked.

“The Empty? Cas, you’re not in the Empty.” Sam reassured him. 

“This is real. Well, this isn’t actually the Bunker but  _ we’re  _ real. You’re not dreaming, sweetheart.” Dean blushed at the term of endearment he’d used. “I-uh…”

“Cas, why would you be in the Empty?” Sam interrupted. Cas stared at the ground. “Are you, uh, dead?”

“Yes. At least, I think so.”

“Jesus Cas! We’ve only been dead for, like, a week!” Dean exclaimed. 

“A week?! You’ve been dead a fucking year!”

“Really?” Dean asked. Castiel nodded. “Shit. You, uh, wanna watch a movie? You can pick which one.”

Castiel knew this was Dean’s way of saying sorry for leaving him for so long. Dean didn’t know how to actually convey his feelings so he changed the subject. And Castiel accepted it because he knew that Dean would eventually say it out loud. And because he knew well that unspoken words were just as powerful as spoken ones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed!!! Leave comments and kudos, they always make my day!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean asks some questions about Cas' death and there's smut.

In most ways this “world” was the same as Earth. They lived in the bunker and they hunted. However, there was no longer a giant evil at every turn and when they hunted, they would get injured and come close to “death” but never actually died. The injuries were really only there to give thrill to the hunt.

They also had more time to just relax and enjoy the peace. Like now. He and Dean were sitting in the Dean Cave as Dean attempted to educate him in a franchise called “Star Wars.”

As A New Hope’s closing credits faded into a black screen, Dean turned to Cas.

He chewed on his lip for a second before blurting out, “How did you die, Cas?”

“I was stabbed.” Castiel really didn’t want to tell Dean what actually happened, he would be so disappointed.

“Who?! Angel? Demon?”

“Angel.” It wasn’t technically a lie. Castiel knew as soon as he lied, Dean would know.

“I’ll kill him!”

“He’s already dead.”

“How’d you know? Did you get him before you died?”

“Yes.” If they were not talking about his suicide, Castiel would have laughed at Dean’s unknowingly perfect words.

“What was his name?”  _ Fuck. _

“Uh-Emiel.” Castiel felt bad for using his brother’s name but  _ Dean couldn’t know. _

“What aren’t you telling me?” Shit, he must have paused for too long.

“Nothing.”

“Come on, Cas. You were telling the truth about everything except the name. The guy is dead, who are you protecting?”

There was a long pause before Castiel muttered, “Me,” and hurried out of the room.

*

What was happening? Cas was stabbed by an angel and the angel died too but Cas couldn’t, or wouldn’t, say his killer’s name. And by not talking he was protecting himself?

Dean started to think of who could kill Cas that Dean knowing would be bad for Cas.

Wait- _ fuck. _

*

Castiel heard a knock on his bedroom door. He knew there was no point not letting Dean in, he’d have to face him eventually, so he waved his hand and unlocked the door.

That was another good thing about Heaven, Castiel had his full powers. Although he still enjoyed sleep and food had taste. And he couldn’t fly out of their Heaven or to other places that didn’t exist in their “world” that existed in the real world (which meant he couldn’t fly to Italy when Dean wanted pizza). But he really didn’t mind.

“Cas?”

“Yeah.” Castiel sighed.

“Did you-uh-kill yourself?”

“Yeah.”

“Fuck, why?”

“You were gone, Dean. And the worst part is, I could’ve saved you. And then others died because I couldn’t save them, not like you could.”

“But, you didn’t know you would come here. You would’ve gone to the Empty!”

“Yes. But at least there, I wouldn’t be aware. I wouldn’t be thinking every second about how I never told you I-“ Castiel caught his mistake just in time and quickly shut up.

“You-“ Dean prompted.

“I love you, goddammit.”

“Really? Like, love love?”

“Yeah.” Here was where Dean would leave the room and ignore him for as long as he could.

“I love you, too.”  _ Wait-what? _

“I know, like family, right?”

“No.”

“This can’t be real. You sure I’m not in the Empty?”

“Yeah. How about I prove it to you.” Dean breathed out before lunging at Castiel.

They met in a ferocious clashing of lips. They had forever, literally, for sweet kisses but now they needed to make up for years of lost time.

To Dean’s surprise, Castiel took control. He nipped at his lips until Dean opened his mouth and Castiel’s tongue snuck inside.

Dean let out a moan when Castiel pinned him against the wall and started sucking down his neck. Cas reaches the bottom of his neck and whined before starting to pull at Dean’s shirt. Dean quickly helped him out and as soon as it was off, Castiel was making his way down Dean’s chest.

Feeling like there was an imbalance, Dean started to undo the buttons, of which there were way too many, on Castiel’s shirt. He had to stop briefly as Castiel sucked ruthlessly on his nipples. He chuckled at the groan that came from the back of Dean’s throat before moving further down.

“Cas.” Dean breathes when the angel was finally on his knees in front of him. He wasted no time pulling Dean’s extremely hard cock from his pants.

With a look of concentration, Castiel wrapped his mouth around and slowly pushed Dean’s cock deeper into his mouth, ignoring Dean’s breathy moans.

“Oh my god.” Dean moaned when he felt his dick bump against the back of Castiel’s throat.

Castiel suddenly pulled off and said, “Please refrain from saying my father’s name while we are performing intercourse.”

“Yeah, yeah, sorry Cas.” Castiel nodded and swallowed Dean down again. This time Castiel didn’t deepthroat him but suckled gently and did this tongue flicking thing that made Dean throw his head back. 

Castiel gave one last sweep of his tongue of the head of Dean’s cock before taking all of him and then staying like that. Dean thanked every holy deity ever that his boyfriend (is that what they were?) didn’t need to breathe and seemed to have no gag reflex.

“Cas,” Dean managed to get out, “if you don’t want me to come like this, you need to stop.”

Castiel pulled off and stood up, giving Dean a sweet kiss. “Bed.” They walked slowly interspersing kisses with removal of items of clothing until they were both in their boxers.

They fell onto the bed, Dean on his back with Castiel’s arms caging him in. They shared more kisses before their erections brushed and they remembered what they were doing before. Castiel rocked into Dean again and gave the most beautiful moan. He allowed himself a few more thrusts before reaching across to his bedside table and grabbing lube.

“You have lube in your room? And here I thought you were so innocent. Cas, you’re a kinky one, aren’t you?” Dean laughed.

“Says the one who tried on panties and liked it.”

Dean turned red. “How’d you-I didn’t-It was one time!”

“We’ll have to fix that.” Castiel growled in his ear and Dean shivered because, truth be told, he really did like wearing panties, they made him feel pretty.

“Shit, Cas.” Dean heard the click of a cap and felt his boxers being pulled down before feeling a probing finger in his most sensitive place. 

Castiel gently pushed his finger inside and Dean gasped. “Are you alright?” Castiel quickly said. If Dean wasn’t so horny he would’ve laughed at how quickly Cas could go from sex god to Worried Boyfriend TM .

“I’m fucking fantastic.” 

Castiel quickly found Dean’s prostate and pressed firmly against it. “Fuck Cas, how are you so good at this?”

“I’ve watched humans perform intercourse for millennia. Although actually doing it is quite different than watching and this isn’t like with April.”

Dean scowled at the mention of that reaper bitch’s name. Castiel soothes him with a kiss and another finger.

“Please Cas.”

“Soon.” Castiel worked two fingers for awhile before reapplying lube and adding a third.

“Come on, Cas. I’m ready.”

“Fine.” Castiel took off his boxers and Dean saw his magnificent cock for the first time. It was long, thick and curved slightly to the left.

“Wait, wait, condoms.”

“Dean, we are in Heaven, I think we’re both clean. And I would be able to tell if either of us had an STD.”

“Right.”

He slowly pushed against Dean until the head popped in. Groaning, he pushed until he was all the way seated.

They stayed like that, getting used to the feeling until Dean said, “So help me, if you do not fucking move-“

Castiel pulled almost all the way out before slamming back in, directly into Dean’s prostate. “Fuck yes.”

They continued like that, moans sneaking into the hot air between them as their skin slid together.

“Cas, Cas, please, I’m gonna come.” Castiel wrapped his hand around Dean’s cock and it only took a few strokes before he exploded, screaming some version of his name. Dean’s hole clenched into an impossibly tight vise which set Castiel off.

Castiel collapsed to the side of Dean, waving his hand to clean up.

“That’s useful. Never thought having an angel for a boyfriend would make it so easy.”

“I’m your boyfriend?”

“Uh-Yeah, I mean, if you want. It’s fine if you don’t.”

“Boyfriend,” Castiel mused, “I like it. But on one condition, you get to be my boyfriend too.”

Dean grinned. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Dean curled into Castiel’s side, who pressed a kiss onto the top of his head. “Goodnight, Dean.”

“Night, Cas. Love you.”

Castiel smiled. “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! The last chapter should be posted soon, I have it written it just needs to be typed. Leave comments and kudos if you remotely enjoyed!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath, but in a good way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the last chapter. I meant to get this out sooner. I had it all written up and everything but with all the COVID stuff, it just completely slipped my mind. I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy! Now, enjoy!

Cas woke up with Dean plastered to his side. He was content to just lay there, he didn’t think he could get out of Dean’s grasp if he tried. And Dean looked so peaceful sleeping, the harsh lines of his face softened and made him look younger.

He didn’t know how long he watched Dean before the man grumbled, “That’s creepy, you know.”

“My apologies. Good morning.”

“That it is.”

“We should stay here all day.”

“Yeah, but, unlike you, I actually need food.”

“I could fly to the kitchen.” Castiel offered.

“Nah, Sammy’ll probably come barging in if we don’t get up anyway. Besides, you can’t cook shit.” Dean rolled out of bed and started to get dressed. Castiel admired his toned figure as Dean bent down to retrieve his boxers.

“Like the view?”

“Very much so.”

“I’m just gonna grab some pajamas from my room. I’ll be right back.” Dean gave him a chaste kiss before leaving the room.

As soon as the door closed, Castiel felt his room grow cold, how did he ever live before Dean? Castiel got out of bed and started to pick up the clothes that littered his floor. All of a sudden, a new pile was dumped next to him.

“Dean!” Castiel chastised.

“Sorry,” Dean had the decency to say, “I also got some pajamas for you, I know you don’t have any.”

“Thank you.” Castiel grabbed one of the old band shirts, pulled it on and put on a pair of flannel pants.

After Dean did the same he pulled Castiel into an embrace. “I like you in my clothes.”

“But, lemme guess, you would like them better on your floor.”

“Yeah. I’m starting to really regret saying I wanted food.”

“Come on, Dean.” Castiel pulled Dean into the hallway.

*

Castiel sighed as he took a sip of coffee. It was one of the flavors he enjoyed most, along with honey, burgers, and to Dean’s delight, pie.

Dean leaned against Castiel’s back and started pressing kisses along his jaw.

“Oh, hey guys. I thought you’d be in your rooms.” Sam strode in. He looked up. “Fucking finally.” He said when he noticed Dean and Cas’ position.

Dean pulled back from Cas a bit. ‘What?”

“Well, really I’m surprised you two didn’t hook up sooner. I mean there isn’t some Apocalypse keeping you apart.”

Dean returned his head to Cas’ shoulder. “Fuck you, bitch.”

“Jerk. Seriously though, congratulations. You can’t get much better than an angel.”

There was a flutter of wings. “What about an archangel?” A familiar voice said. 

“Gabe?” Cas said. Gabriel looked at Castiel, then Dean.

“Fucking finally.” Dean rolled his eyes.

“Gabe, what are you doing here? I thought you were roaming the Earth and hanging out with pornstars.”

“Well, I was. But I wanted to check on you. And tell you that Heaven is under new rule.”

“You’re ruling Heaven?” Dean said doubtfully.

“Well, it’s more of a democracy,” Dean smirked and nodded, “but I have power!”

“So you’re the one who got me here?” Castiel asked.

“What? No, this democracy thing only happened recently. That was Chuck.”

“Well at least he did one good thing.” Dean said.

“Why?” Castiel asked.

Gabriel shrugged. “Wanted a happy ending, I guess.” There was a pause as all the new information sunk in. “Right. Well, I should be getting back. But I’ll definitely be coming back.” Gabe gave Sam a wink before disappearing.

“Okay, so that happened, what now?” Sam asked.

“Enjoy forever.” Castiel responded, looking at Dean.

“Dude, I was talking about for today.” Dean and Cas paid him no attention, too content to stare at each other. “God, I thought we were past this, get a room!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Sam, maybe Gabe can help cheer him up ;). There is a really short sequel that I'm writing that focuses on Sabriel so stay tuned.  
> Until then, I hope you enjoyed! Please leave comments and kudos if you did because they make my day!


End file.
